WHY DO YOU NEED A TRIBE OF MEN?
ery simple, look at the history of last 100years...
1 - Big wars happened, many many men died or were away for long months, and came back broken and tired.
2 - Women were taking care of the children:
how many male teachers did you have at school? especially in the early years?
do you know any male babysitter?
3 - Women accumulated a lot of repressed anger toward men, due to centuries of violence and abuse!
So a generation of boys was educated to respond to women's wishes/ideas/education, while
these women weren't so much interested to see around empowered men!
If you look at tribal life, there's a moment in the boy's life when he detaches from the mother to start to go around with the father. This is crucial to his growth as a becoming-man. It's the time when he starts to work, fight, hurt, stand for his rights, experience fear and integrate it.
The education of the boy is totally on the responsibility of the father/men.
Now look at our modern culture:
many years ago papa would bring his boy at work with him, to show what he does and also to let him help a bit with the activities.
This ended when our fathers started to work in their offices, where no child has permission to go. There was a separation!
If a child is educated like that, this is what he will teach his son when he will become a father, this is what he knows!
SO MOST LIKELY YOU, THAT READ THIS,
YOU ARE TRYING TO FIND YOUR MEN IDENTIFICATION THROUGH WOMEN EYES!!
be a good lover, a good father, a good man, a good worker...
you want to be sooo goood!
You know what?
I'm sorry to tell you that this cannot happen because women don't know how it is to experience life as a man.
They are women!
And even if women like to tell us how to behave and what to do, when, it seems that they actually do it more to TEST us.
No woman is interested in having a relationship with a doormat.
So let's go back to the MEN TRIBE!
Why is so important?
because is the place where you will build your strength,
where you can be vulnerable but not a victim,
where you can be pushed out from any childhood pattern
to step into your male power.
Masculine is depicted as aggressive, violent, rude, tough, strong, dangerous and more of this kind.
For me a Mature Man is someone that doesn't identify with this characteristics, he just figured out through experience how to deal with them in a beneficial way for him and his community.
He knows how to handle and surrender to the chaos of life. He enjoys the wildness of creation!
He lives like this, because he tried out something, and made mistakes, while there was somebody supporting him without any other interest than to also have around a powerful brother ready for life!
We cannot continue to look at women as a referral point,
or worse try to find out our masculinity as lone wolves.
It doesn't work.
We need to work together, to figure it out for ourselves,
take the chance and the challenge to confront our demons, our past and the past of our fathers,
say excuse me
ask for forgiveness,
say thank you!
and come out anew,
stronger, clearer and ways more beautiful than before!
If you are interested in working with other men,
learn from each other and support each other growth
, I'll update you about next retreats or online men circles.
P Valentino B